Our Theme Year: For Sale

As I was mowing the lawn this morning (hopefully for the last time this season), it hit me: today is October 1. For most of you, this date probably doesn’t mean much. It’s not a federal holiday or a national day of remembrance (and if it is, my apologies). But for me, October 1 usually kicks off one of my top two holidays—Halloween.

Normally, today is when I haul out our collection of “cute” Halloween decorations. Think inflatable ghosts, Jack the Pumpkin King, Sarah, and a very tall pumpkin-headed man. The kind of stuff that makes people walking by smile and say, “Awww.” Each year, I’d add a new inflatable to the mix, with the ultimate plan of filling the whole yard.

But those cutesy inflatables are just the warm-up act. In the early morning hours of October 31, we always take them down and switch to the real show: full-on scary, gory, and creepy. Each year, we pick a theme and go all out, hoping to send trick-or-treaters running while still making them think, “That house was awesome—can’t wait for next year.” Mikey passes out the candy (he loves chatting with the little ones), and I? I live for the scares. I like to say, “Halloween is the one night of the year I can terrify children without the police being called.” Honestly, though, my favorite targets are the dads—it’s pure joy to see them jump.

Over the years, we’ve built a little Halloween fan club. Neighbors and parents tell us they look forward to it each year. Just a few weeks ago, a mom of two said her kids couldn’t wait to see what we’d do this time.

Except this year, things are different. The inflatables were sold at our garage sale, the scary decorations are still packed away in the attic, and there will be no screams at ### O###### S# on October 31. The house will be dark. I suppose this year’s theme is simply: For Sale.

With any luck, by then we’ll be in Uruguay, where Halloween isn’t celebrated like it is here—just another adjustment I’ll have to make.

Countdown: 12 days and counting (holy shit).